Telescope Gifts

Man using telescope to play darts.

"Lemme know when you’re ready to howl at it."

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'Slip Ahoy!'

"Trying to impress us on your first day is understandable, but the moon has already been discovered."

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

"New researches use it in daylight hours only."

'My God we being invaded!'

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

"Hurray! I discovered a new planet!"

"I've either discovered dark matter, or I've left the lens cap on."

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

Scientist drinking night sky through telescope

'He runs this firm like a ship.'

'Hey, guys, come over here. I just discovered the telescope.'

Venice 1609: Someone plays a practical joke on Galileo. . .

"As an astronomer, this discovery heralds a new golden age of academic fervor for mathematicians and astrophysicists across the globe. As a Sagittarius, I'm fucked."

'The last thing I said to him was: 'whatever you do, don't look at the sun through this thing'.'

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

Astronomers using giant telescope to light fires.

'We discovered a massive dust and gas cloud which is either the beginning of a new star of just a hell of a lot of dust and gas.'

"All I get is a bird's eye view."

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

Entry level astronomer...

"Since you've been watching me on my planet, I was hoping you could tell me where I lost my phone."

Alien surrendering to huge telescope because it looks like a gun

New Images from Hubble

A very young mariner. A young mariner. An ancient mariner.

Les Bons Bourgeois - Looking in vain for the planet Leverrier

Little guy using telescope to see past a big guy blocking his view in the crowd,