Telephone Tricksters Pillows

Telephone Reciever In Mouse Hole

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

'I'm going to have to transfer you to someone I don't like.'

RETURN BOOKS HERE, 'I'm sorry, sir -- all our books on Houdini have disappeared.'

"You're young enough to play tag, but not old enough to borrow my phone to play phone tag."

'Waiter, there's a cell phone in my soup.'

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

'Hold on, there might be someone more interesting on the other line...'

'Jenny can't come to the phone, she's naked. Only joking, mate. Wrong number.'

Snowman Magic

"The secret of time management? Never take anyone off hold."

'Does Santa have skype?. . . I'd like to get in some face time, so he puts me at the top of his list come December. . .'

"What do you mean: 'You don't believe that this is my answerphone'? Do you think I'd lie?"

'It's for you.'

"Operator, I'd like to make a person-to-person call, and I'd like to reverse the roles."

Prank Cattle Calls. (mmph)

'Nope! Wrong again! Let's try it again... around and around... now which cup is your nitroglycerin tablet under?'

'Are you gonna answer that?'

'He's in a meeting. Would you like to speak to his assistant?'

A.T.&T.'s New Competitors

"Yethhh, hello. . .are you clothed?"

Throw-Your-Voice Mail.

'This is Jake. I'm not in now, so please leave a message...HELLO! HELLO! This is Jake! Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm just mesin' with you! I'm still NOT in!'

'Stupid telebarketers.'

'I don't care if today IS 'casual day'! Stop answering the phone with 'International Beeswax Machines'!'

I can't come in today. I haven't got chronic diarrhoea!

"I hope you don't think that music while I waited soothed me."

"I'm sorry, he's not here right now, but I could get one of his socks for you."

'I'm away from my desk. At the sound, please leave a message.' (Man has horn in his hand).

Cold-calls.

"Hey, is your refrigerator running?" Jake and Billy make their last prank call.

'As you can see, nothing up my sleeves...'

I'm away from my desk, please leave a message after my interpretation of a beep.

It's that heavy breathing again.

'I can't tell if it's an obscene phone call or one of your friends panting.'