Telecom Lawyer Gifts

Telecoms Law

Squeezing the Free Press.

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"Miss Duxbury, put me through to someone."

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

Data From a Truck

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

"We've been cancelled."

HUAWEI 5G

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

'What does the internet have against my people?'

Do your emails stand out from the rest?

'The boss said things have to improve or my job is going to run out of minutes.'

Astronaut sees cell tower on the moon.

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

"Well, at least one of us passed the emoji eye exam..."

'With all these mega mergers between electronics and telecommunications firms, I just got an obscene email from the toaster...'

Holding the Line Against Terrorists with Midrange IQs

'It's engaged.'

'The boss said things have to improve or my job is going to run out of minutes.'

'Wrong number. Sorry, I dialled my salary by mistake.'

Networking

Cold caller.

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

"This is a computer speaking. I will now misconnect you and your party."

"Camera not working."