Teenagerhood Gifts

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

'Teenagers!'

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

Wordplay: Hibernation.

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

"Three more years of high school."

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

Grand. Baby Grand. Toddler Grand. Teen Grand.

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

PROBLEM AREAS

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

The Life and Times of Miley Cyrus

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

'I'm not doing well in Chemistry - I'm out of my element.'

Fishbowl rebellion.

How did you get your parents to send you to Costa Rica this summer, Ingrid? By almost flunking Spanish. That's dire. Hardly! I'll party and practice my accent. Next year�remind me to bring my French grade down. Si!

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'