Teenage Troubles Gifts

"Cheer up. Your dad had so many pimples in high school, we played connect-the-dots on his yearbook photo."

How did you get your parents to send you to Costa Rica this summer, Ingrid? By almost flunking Spanish. That's dire. Hardly! I'll party and practice my accent. Next year�remind me to bring my French grade down. Si!

"Looking cool in a car takes practice."

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'Why would a just God allow so many teenage vampire movies?'

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

'These are very powerful tranquilizers for when your teen has he horrific tantrums. Take two of them anytime she flares up.'

"Yeah, I've noticed it too: Young Master's smell has changed a lot since he's become a teenager..."

"Baldo, we need to talk."

'You've failed to reach your performance targets,we'll have to let you go.'

"Nicole, Kyle, would you guys burn my yearbook?"

'You're probably just trying to get our attention, son, and believe me, you've succeeded in a big,big way.'

"So...have you ever kissed a girl before?"

Gotta babysit. Too bad! Tap tap. The worst part is the first! Subduing little monsters? Tap tap. No

'Teachers' Dreams.' 'Young man, either you remove your hand from under her sweater or I will remove it your arm.'

Sugar And Spice And Full On Drama

"I feel sorry for kids these days - they're always being tested for something"

"I think I'll be more relaxed once my secondary sex characteristics kick in."

"Our little girl is growing up - this very morning she told me she hates me."

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

'I think I'm beginning to understand what sex is all about.'

'I was a teenager once too, dear.'

'Don't be silly mum, the morning after pill doesn't work 14 years after conception.'

All Metamorphosed And No Place To Go.

'Son, you're too old for pester power, why don't you go outside and get some peer pressure.'

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

"Can Hilary come out to abstain from having sex?"

"Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be?" "Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person." "If you think 'being you' includes being dirty, that means you're a dirty, slovenly filth-beast..." "...who will end up alone and miserable because no liv

"I want to be a stand up comic, but life's not crap enough."

"Don't you...sometimes get the feeling...that for some reason...we're not like anyone else?"

"OK...not taking a shower is not an option for teenage boys!"

"Ask Sadie advice hour! What's your problem?!" "Being a high school student is literally killing me! I sit all day at school, and sit all evening doing my homework." "Stop yer sniveling!!! Every student since the beginning of time has had to deal with this problem." "Yes, you're sitting all day. But like any other teenager, you should be burning thousands of calories anyway." "The eye-rolling alone should burn up to 473 calories per hour. Pick up the pace, slacker!!!"

"The thing is, I've grown and you haven't."

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