Teenage Chaos Embracer Gifts

"I'm organising a collection in aid of the kitchen...would you care to make a donation?"

Instructional guide to scribbling

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

Summertime.

What the woman who spent years frantically trying to get her ducks in a row eventually learned.

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

"I've given up trying to be on top of things."

'Actually, they're pretty nice, once they settle down.'

Some of us are calm on the surface but paddling like crazy underneath, and some of us are just the opposite.

'His thought process is non-linear. It bounces around like a tumbling tumbleweed!'

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

Jackson Pollock the Spider

"Listen up and listen up good, 'cause I'm only going to say this a million times."

You Know You're Old When...

'He's doing it again.'

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

"Mmm... now WHERE did i leave my radio..?"

"Well, could you give me a ballpark number?"

Welcome home from the lake! I need a shower! Ditto! Hey! How about a hug first? I need a shower! I can smell the love!

Fortune teller predicts a bigger family for worried parents.

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

"I'm a professional organizer. At home, I like to relax."

"Can't find your office, doc?"

Courtney Love

'I'm all about quantity.'

"He and I connected physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially, humorously, technologically, and self-destructively."

Shit Happens (bumper sticker)

'Are you sure every artist paints himself?'

'How did the 'creative way of thinking' course go?'

'Teachers' Dreams.' 'Young man, either you remove your hand from under her sweater or I will remove it your arm.'

'Call me crazy, but I think my paperwork is actually following me.'

Man rummaging through a TV set throwing out bits of paper

'You'd better clear out some rooms, nurse. He jumped off a bridge, and all his friends are behind him.'

You can keep your surroundings clean and well-organized, but that won't stop life from sometimes getting very messy.

'We've got a problem - They're starting to enjoy it.'