Teen Party Gifts

"Spin the Noodle"

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'No standing while room is in motion.'

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

'He made an excellent jelly.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

"I am so attracted to you right now."

Face painting by numbers.

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

Shaken not stirred

Little Princess.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

Beers

Balancing two espresso martinis

'Maybe the batteries are dead.'

Children's Party

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

Kids with Fish Balloons

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

A Woman Holding Canapes

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

'Guess how many I ATE.'

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

Children playing games

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

"Whine and cheezed party."

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"