Teen Memories Gifts

'I was nineteen here in Paris, once, but I was a stupid nineteen.'

Haircuts

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

"Three more years of high school."

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

Bike Rides

"He's gone goth"

PROBLEM AREAS

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'I think there was a typo in the lab instructions.'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

Fishbowl rebellion.

What've you been up to since college, Lemont? Oh, I became a journalist … had a kid, blah blah … but I wanna hear about you, Rudy. Grigori Rasputin. How've you been all these years? How's your Uncle Mort? Are you a Russian spy? Boop boop boop. How'd that stomach-tumble-translator startup you founded in the nineties go? Wait ... what did you say you became? What do they have on President Trump? How's your cat? Boop.

"I've tracked our GPS coordinates over the past week dad. Well, we're roaming the plains alright!"

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

"Mom said eat everything in moderation, so I renamed the cookie jar 'Moderation.'"

'I almost get out the door and then my mom yells...'Don't you know it's February?!' And here I am again...looking like an eskimo.'

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

"Trust me. This is going to make it easier to discuss your childhood."

"Frankly, Jackie Paper, I’ve done all I can with strings and sealing wax."

"I'll be glad when this is over and Sarah can be herself again."

Social Networking.

Do you ever wonder if there's really a higher power? What do you mean? Is there an all-knowing being that keeps track of you? That always knows where you are

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

"Next time make up your mind and just pick one!"

What are you looking for in a college? A strong environmental program. Ok. Pick 4 or 5 we could visit. I've got 3 days for the trip. There's one in Ohio. Can do. One in Maine, Iowa and California. You need a good geography program. Here's another one. Where's St. Paul?

"Now, my brave little soldier, do you have everything...an apple for your teacher, your satchel, pencils and books - your existential misery??"

'No fair. Someone ate the popsicle off the stick.'

Jack in the Box

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

Teenage Angst.

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'