Technology Analyst Gifts

'Of course things change: our fathers were replaced by machines - we'll be replaced with new software.'

"It takes a while for technological advances to benefit everybody equally."

Weapons of War Through the Ages.

Self-Driving Cars

'Tech stocks traded higher on the rumor that cars cound run on pentium computer chips.'

"Welcome to your first day of work at Megamaximart. . ."

"Smartphone sales" "Degradation of society"

Facebook in Crisis

Mobile phones replace books

Money Today: "Ours is a cybercurrency. It's not a virtual currency or a cryptocurrency."

"I want my job back."

"Thank you all for attending this first conference of the surveillance camera recording industry."

"That satellite that constantly tracks our position on earth to within fifty feet recommends that we get out more."

Progress?

'Oh-oh- planned obsolescence!'

"Notice, gentlemen, how after two hours of phone deprivation, the subject reverts to a pre-natal state."

At any time of day, and for no good reason, they know where you are...Meanwhile, at a press conference at Malaysia Airlines...

Intel announced it has developed an ultra-fast computer chip. The remarkable technology will add extraordinary speeds to the computing and mobile phone experience. Technology industry analysts noted that the implications are profound. For instance, dropped calls and frozen computer screens will happen faster than ever.

Automatons Unemployment Office

Subtle, Enormous Spy Satellite

Drone Spam

For $2500 You Could Now Murder Anyone You Want Using a Remote Drone

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

The Anti-Agent

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

Light Bulb Moment

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'