Technical Analyst Gifts

'I'm the groom's broker and I'll be seating you before the ceremony begins. Technical analysts will be sitting on the left, and fundamental analysts will be on the right.'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

Great Chinese Dynasties

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

UK/US Free Trade Deal

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"Google car."

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

Light Bulb Moment

"Meet the author"

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

The Life of Pi

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Morning, all!"

Lethal Presentation

Ascent of Machine.

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

Time Is Money

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

Early Adopter...Early Opt-Outer

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"While you were working on fire, I was working on my satellite. Once we figure out how to launch it into the heavens, other inventions will follow, like phones, GPS, weather predictions. . ."

"Perhaps this slide whistle can better illustrate what this graph is telling us."