Tech Transitionist Gifts

'We're trying to get him used to e-mail by putting it in a familiar setting.'

'Dude, touring with a punk rock band was fun, but what I'd really like to do is be CEO of a fortune 500 company.'

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

"Nice design but you haven't quite mastered the technology!"

'Our goal is for you to successfully transition to your new job before retirement age.'

'I'm excited about my new job. I know I have some small shoes to fill.'

"Hi..just ringing to see if you got my e-mail?"

Turning 'Raw Hype' Into 'Pure Hype'

"There - is outplacement a challenge or what?"

Bookshop: Closed, Coming Soon Here Internet Cafe.

Man Gives Computer Therapy/

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."

"The greenest gadget in this high-tech office is still this old pencil sharpener."

'Ms. Haskell, as we transition to paperless, do you think I should carry a briefcase or laptop...or both?'

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

'Meet Charles, the office 'old-timer'. He's been hangin' around stock tickers, water coolers, copy machines, and now laser printers for 40 years!'

"Who on earth would call on a landline? How rude!"

'And this is where they switched to High Definition.'

"I'm just checkin' my email, OK! I AM NOT googling it..."

"My job as a homing pigeon is a lot easier now I am using the GPS."

'Couldn't you just leave that here until we're sure the new system works?'

'What are you staring at? You have free wi fi here, don't you?'

Easy Riders Of The Old West.

"That's old Bailey and his ever so secret project...."

'Before computers, son, we were nerds who shuffled paper.'

'Why, yes. . . Bert did work as a mortgage broker before opening this place. . . How'd you guess?'

"Have you seen my CD player?"

"He's so used to someone carrying his files."

"In case of emergency, do you know how to work a pencil?"

"I think my filing cabinet is a little more practical."

After 15 years Mike was released

'Why did you leave your last job?'