Tech-savvy Spiritualists Pillows

"OMG"

Fortune teller "Ah, yes, the internet is just coming through"

"The meaning of life? Didn't you see the FAQ on my website?"

'If your guru business is slow, do what I did. Get a professional website presence on the Internet. That's how you found me, right?'

Gangster doesn't have proper password for Heaven.

"I'm your guardian angel. But due to some technical glitz, I happen not to be invisible!"

"Sorry - your guru isn't in at the moment, but please leave a message after the tone: Ommmmmmm....."

"Welcome to the Lord's House. Now in high definition."

"Does the ark have wifi?"

"I'm going on a retreat."

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

"Sorry - I've got to take this..."

First O.M.G. church.

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'I got one of those new crystal ball smart watches.'

"Joe, is that you? Can you really hear me? What's the password for the email?"

Cable Bill.

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

". . . and don't forget to like and subscribe to my channel. Amen."

You Have 1 New Messages

"The gods must be on-line tonight."

"And the weird shall inherit the Earth, for their ways are difficult for A.I. algorithms to figure out."

Holy phone

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

Heaven is unattended...leave your prayers at the sound of the tone.

Palm Top Readings

'We'll put our horses in 'Do Not Track' mode by going through this stream bed.'

RunningBear@Arrowhead.com.

"We have a new app that does sin to atonement conversion."

"I can tell much more about you if I read your Palm Pilot."

Confession plugged up to an amp.

Binary meditation.