Tech-savvy Pen Pal Gifts

"We're not friends-she just e-mails me things I'm not interested in."

21st century water cooler conversations.

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

Klimt Kiss Phones

"How sweet, you texted me. . . I love you too!"

'No, I'm not being tracked by scientists, just by my wife...'

'After sex he checks his cell phone messages.'

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

"Out of all your 277 passwords, not once did you use my name. Are you losing feelings for me?"

"I take back everything bad I said about AI."

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

Mobile phones and long distance relationships,

"The wifi password? Of course Madame, it's 'Ilove100boobies69'."

'Long distance romances in the twenty first century.'

'Nothing's more romantic than dinner by kindle light.'

"I used to know my wife's fondest dreams and desires, but now I leave that to Google."

"Remember, if you enjoy this intercourse, don't forget to 'like and subscribe'."

"Our online romance needs fresh start. I think it's time to hit 'ctrl', 'alt', 'delete'."

'Young Love'

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

'We've entered the 'password sharing' phase of our relationship!'

'Please pay attention. Pretend I'm a movie on your phone.'

The password: "C'mon everybody try to remember!"

Dan tells me you're an architect. That is so cool! Thanks! Cloud architect, actually.

"I wish you'd stop obsessively checking your feed!"

"This chasing stick app makes things so much easier."

'I didn't know people still played footsie.'

Emoticons and human relationships.

'You are not haunted by the voices of the dead - You are tuned to four extra.'