Tech-savvy Mourners Pillows

"Pleasant Hill Funeral Home. Free Wi-Fi."

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

"Does the ark have wifi?"

Follow God On Twitter

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

"We're testing a new virtual reality praise & worship system for the satellite campus."

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

"Do you know of any good empathy apps?"

"It might be a while, the server just crashed again."

Priest's computer screen reads: 'e-confession. Please type 10 Hail Marys ... and no cut'n'paste ...'

End of world nigh!!!

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

"Please select hymn number 637 on your i-pods."

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

Fortune teller using a computer rather than traditional methods

Church Sign Asks If You Are Prepared for Digital Conversion.

"Sorry, but the Wi-Fi password is for tithing church members only."

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

'It will be nice to have the words of my sermon there but it could be distracting to run football scores ... '

Jesus Saves

'What do you mean 'IamThePope.com' is already taken?!? By who!?!'

'Number 1 on my fave 5 is Dial-A-Prayer.'

The pastor forgot to remove his wireless mic before entering the baptismal."

'Click on the icon.'

"I've never seen the congregation praying this hard."

"And do please remember to visit our online confession service."

'Please enter your sin, followed by the pound sign.'

"Before I commit. . . what's the wi-fi like?"

"This model is great. It monitors my heart rate, vitals and counts my blessings."

'My spreadsheet says we must lighten by 152 pounds.'

'You're a genius Carlisle.'