Tech-savvy Commentator Gifts

"What's this 11th commandment - thou shalt not tweet without thinking?"

'Why not? It always works in women's fashion.'

'The budget negotiators are meeting in a smoke-filled room behind closed doors - but one committee member is live blogging it.'

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

'...honestly I just feel like we don't communicate like we used to!'

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

"I'd like to TikTok your offer and get comments before saying yes or no."

"Dad's got a promotion. How can now mute middle management."

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

"I haven't the slightest idea who he is. He came bundled with the software."

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

How logos change over time.

"Basically it makes the same mistakes we've always made - but it makes tham so much faster!"

'Can't we handle this through more impersonal channels like text messaging?'

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

I've always been slower than computers...

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

'Uh, yeah, the picture resolution is great.'

'No Jenkins! I said we need to start using the Cloud! The C-L-O-U-D!'

"What we need in this organisation is more personal contact."

'Peter Rabbit and his sisters, Floppy Disc and Mopsy.'

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

"That guys is stealing my data!"

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

Facelook

Noah posted his first tweet.

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

The Web is mightier than the sword.

"I can't remember, did you text me, call me, tweet me, email me, or just tell me about it?"

Isn't it cool? I printed out my reply to your raise request using the 3-D printer! NO!

I hear you're sending Rudy to a clandestine meeting with Russian agents for the purpose of coordinating the blackmailing of the American president. What?! I am not! What ever gave you such an outlandish idea? I overheard Rudy asking Siri "How do I say 'hello' in Russian?" That proves nothing. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'my boss wants your boss to blackmail our president' in Russian?" That could mean anything. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'that means exactly what it sounds like it means

"Hey Alexa, make it nice and easy for hackers to keep tabs on everything I do and influence my voting intentions."

"Remember, the password is case sensitive."