Tech Industry Leader Gifts

"This is Alexander. He’ll be heading up our hacking division."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

US v.s. Tech Giants

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'Yes, it is large for a smart phone, but then it does do absolutely everything.'

"The results are impressive, but it'll be decades before we can transmit and receive pornography."

How logos change over time.

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

"We're looking for an accountant who can use ChatGPT creatively."

"Have a seat with the other candidates for the tech position but be wary of the spit balls."

Bluesky helicopter evacuation from X

"You're hired!"

'Tech stocks rose on news that nerds are now considered 'hip'.'

Lord Avariss - Captain of Industry

"What do I do - I'm a mouse pilot, like everybody else."

The Design Artiste

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

'Doesn't bother me. All my money is in carbon-cleanup technologies.'

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

Diner is served

"Can you go through all the old pitch decks and replace the word 'crypto' with 'AI'?"