Tech Gadget Fan Pillows

'The only pacemaker covered by your health insurance is this MP3 player with heavy metal music.'

"It's my selfie stick. But I look a lot more attractive from a distance."

Widescreen TV turns out to be as deep as it is wide.

'Due to budget cuts, all agents will now be equipped with x-ray glasses.'

'It monitors your life signs -- we call it the 'grim beeper.''

STRIP Hambone: Paper work

'Podcasting!'

"The game's over. Will you switch it back to our home security cam?"

"Can you change that ring tone to something other than a dog bark?"

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

Nerd tryouts.

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

Time Machine Collision

Useless add-ons.

Dawing your Cellphone

'Hey...remember T.V.?

Bicycle sat nav.

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

"I got a swiss army hook!"

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

'E-books?'

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

"Careful. That house has a taser."

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

"I had an Android, then I switched to an iPhone. Then I went back to an Android, then I switched back to the iPhone. . ."

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'