Tech Gadget Fan Pillows

'The only pacemaker covered by your health insurance is this MP3 player with heavy metal music.'

"It's my selfie stick. But I look a lot more attractive from a distance."

Widescreen TV turns out to be as deep as it is wide.

'Due to budget cuts, all agents will now be equipped with x-ray glasses.'

'It monitors your life signs -- we call it the 'grim beeper.''

STRIP Hambone: Paper work

'Podcasting!'

"The game's over. Will you switch it back to our home security cam?"

"Can you change that ring tone to something other than a dog bark?"

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"String ... you mean it doesn't have a remote controller to operate it?"

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

Dawing your Cellphone

Time Machine Collision

Nerd tryouts.

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

Useless add-ons.

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

Bicycle sat nav.

"I got a swiss army hook!"

"Careful. That house has a taser."

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

'E-books?'

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

'This is suppose to be progress.'

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'When I said that I needed a new mouse...'