Tech Fan Pillows

"But you told me to go outside and play!"

'Believe me, you're not the first customer who's dropped their phone in the litter box.'

"But I'm hot on the trail of my Google doppelgänger."

"I asked my investment advisor for something that was low cost, easy to manage, and also functions on its own. He suggested an index fund or a robo vac."

What we thought Elon Musk did...What Elon Musk actually does...

Free Range Computers.

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

In the Guru District

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Claus 2.0

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

"Uh-oh...it's starting to delegate work to me."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'

"Would you like to keep eighty-seven tabs open?"

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'