Team Restructuring Gifts

There's going to be a lot of this around here.

Speed of assimilation VS New team members

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"This position has become very important to the company."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

Others will fight for you

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

"Well the good news is that after the reorganisation you'll be leading the team."

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"Be careful what you wish for, Bob, because you just might get it. And if it happens to be what I was wishing for, things could get pretty ugly around here."

Voice coming from wooden horse: 'Quiet Fanshaw! If this hostile take-over bid is going to work we've got to get right inside the boardroom.'

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

Teamwork!

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

'We divested ourselves of a division here, a subsidiary there, a branch here, an affiliate there...there's nothing left!'

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"Tell the vice presidents they've downsized enough."

"Hire a cost cutting, bad-guy consultant to turn me into a good guy during the layoffs."

"It's o.k., come on out."

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

'If sales don't improve incrementally... our business outlook will change excrementally...'

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

'Hey, I'm not paying you people to watch the clock. That's Henderson's job.'

"That's unanimous then - we don't know what to do."

"What we didn't have but obviously needed was an alarmist."