Team Party Gifts

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

The trauma of losing.

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

21st century water cooler conversations.

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

"The meeting will come to order."

Here and There Trays

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

That shows business confidence.

Sign - Halt manager crossing

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

Party Animals.

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Support Group for a Good Problem

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'