Team Dynamics Analyst Gifts

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"This position has become very important to the company."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

Others will fight for you

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"It's o.k., come on out."

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

'Hey, I'm not paying you people to watch the clock. That's Henderson's job.'

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

'It never fails. I offer a tiny bit of constructive criticism, and everybody accuses me of carping!'

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

It come's to my attention that you have been doing the work of two men.

"I'm leaving. It's just way too much collaborating."

I like what I'm seein' out there. This could be our year Wikowski.

'Thanks, Brian, for your thoughtful and constructive proposal. Without further ado, we'll now dive into malicious, envy-based criticism, character assassination and petty bickering!'

'I think I found the bottleneck, Boss.'

"Next on the agenda: How can we crush workers' spirit, while appearing to care?"

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

"Most of us get around the company motto by saying 'No can do' instead!"

"It's time for your performance review where I damn you with faint praise."

"I expect you all to be team players - except Ted, whom I expect to remain team mascot."

'Yes, I work well with others - just not with these others.'

'Are we us or them?'

"It's late. I am not getting into another heated discussion with you."

'Hank here brings 10 years of top sales experience to our company so let's all try to make him feel welcome while he makes you all look bad...'

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'