Team Dynamics Observer Gifts

"There's always a prima donna."

"Two's company, three's an organization."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 18

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"This means we need to trot out the company apologist again."

"The marketing department says it's my turn to kick the ball."

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

"This position has become very important to the company."

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Others will fight for you

"We can waste time and look for a solution or...just find a scapegoat?"

'I guess every team needs a creative renegade.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

"It's o.k., come on out."

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'Hey, I'm not paying you people to watch the clock. That's Henderson's job.'

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

'It never fails. I offer a tiny bit of constructive criticism, and everybody accuses me of carping!'

"I'm leaving. It's just way too much collaborating."

I like what I'm seein' out there. This could be our year Wikowski.

What are we doing today? Installing raised beds. Then we'll plant them for a couple who want organic vegetables. Brilliant, Dad. Tree's Tree Nursery. You take the hard work out of gardening. Right. And give it to me! Right again!

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

'Thanks, Brian, for your thoughtful and constructive proposal. Without further ado, we'll now dive into malicious, envy-based criticism, character assassination and petty bickering!'

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

'I think I found the bottleneck, Boss.'

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."