Tax Code Whisperer Gifts

'Luckily it's 'all Greek' to us.'

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

Computer Expert

The transparent safe box of Panama

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

'We do spend a lot and tax a lot, but it's the price you pay for living in a money-based economy.'

'I feel I owe a lot to my country.' - 'So, you haven't paid your income tax again.'

I.R.S. - Attention Investors! Remember to 'Buy low, sell high' so we can collect capital gains tax!

"I wish I had done more pro bono work. I need the tax write offs."

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

'Sir, what's this big once in a lifetime nonnegotiable deduction?'

'Don't worry. he always does that right before he raises taxes.'

News. To broaden the tax base, they started making robots pay income tax. Of course! They can't vote. IRS. My first tax return and I get audited! They said everything was wrong! Despite the fact humans totally rely on us, we can't list them as dependents! They said my "net income" is not what I earned working online. And I shouldn't have used the "short" form even though I' have some bad electrical wiring! You'll do better next time ... just remember to disconnect your logic board befo

'I wonder if I can declare you as dependents on my income taxes?'

"It's funny how two intelligent people can have such opposite interpretations of the tax code!"

'I wanted a few words about your tax return - have I called at an inconvenient time?'

'But, there must be some mistake. I don't want to buy the school.'

'Are you sure it's necessary to sign this part declaring 'all information is true and correct to the best of my knowledge'?.'

"Do you mind if we do this without the violins?"

Tax haven.

'What we need is a tax on stupid ideas. The revenue out of Washington alone would balance the budget in two years.'

'Hey! Roll a mile in my shoes!'

'Please enter the amount owed here...use an extra sheet of paper if required.'

Personalized Tax-Return Mailers.

Spyware is easy to see, if you know where to look.

Exit Code

'...and if my taxes are cut, I promise to stimulate the economy.'

IRS. I made less money this year than last year because I spent six months filling out my tax form!

Uncle Sam.

'No campaign contributions to deduct? -- Tsk, tsk, tsk....'