Tax Code Decodist Gifts

I.R.S. - Attention Investors! Remember to 'Buy low, sell high' so we can collect capital gains tax!

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

The transparent safe box of Panama

Flat tax - equal burden?

'This graph may need some explaining...'

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

"According to his will, he wants his outstanding debts to be shared equally between the three of you."

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

'I feel I owe a lot to my country.' - 'So, you haven't paid your income tax again.'

"We're going to play the boss's favorite game - 'pin the blame on the scapegoat.'"

Basic Tax Law/Loopholes.

'Only one thing could be worse than paying income tax...' '..Not having to pay it.'

'We struck these tax laws, but they somehow spontaneously regenerated into line 501(c), section 746-e, subsection (3), as described in paragraph (2).'

"We invested everything we had in our marriage."

'I wonder if I can declare you as dependents on my income taxes?'

"Nice try, Mr. Willis, but it won't make any difference."

"It's funny how two intelligent people can have such opposite interpretations of the tax code!"

"Well, you helped me with my initial health issue, but now I've got headaches from dealing with billing and insurance!"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Holmes, but we just can't allow all these deductions."

"I've got a little job for you, Kretchmer. I want you to infiltrate the I.R.S. and sow the seeds of compassion."

'Please enter the amount owed here...use an extra sheet of paper if required.'

'We invested everything we had in our marriage.'

'No campaign contributions to deduct? -- Tsk, tsk, tsk....'

"I have a home office. Can I deduct trips to the kitchen and bathroom?"

'I see here you're a professional writer. That explains the touch of whimsy in your return.'

'I'm now ready to make my own way in the world. But first, can you guys loan me 200 grand to pay off my student loan?'

'I tried forgetting about life's little stresses and I got busted for tax evasion.'

Revenue Canada gift shop.

'It's the toxic learning environment.'

'Don't fret about losing, boys! I bought the team to offset taxable capital gains!'

'Coffee? Tea? Complimentary orange jumpsuit?'

"Hello, IRS Refunds?...I just called to say I love you, I just called to say how much I care..."

Wow, the books of a corrupt corporation. I am in heaven.

'If I had known he writes tax code for the IRS, I never would have asked him to fill out a comment card.'

'You've done this before.'