Tavern Hopper Pillows

'Pink elephants are one thing, but poor Smitty sees Smurfs!'

"This place has the best happy hour."

Today's special... donuts.

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'You've had enough!'

Clubbing

"Can we get some more bread sticks over here?"

Sober Tooth Tiger

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

Next Round Indicator

It's like playing hooky...I let my cell phone batteries die!

"Well, what's your recommendation?"

"I'm tired of being openly gay.I'm seriously considering going back in to the closet."

'Do not stand while the room is in motion.'

The Stumble Inn Bar & Grill

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

"Your shout!"

Of all the gin joints in the world, you are here.

Daily Grind Coffee Cup

'SAME SOCKS BAR.'

'Going 'cold turkey' might be dangerous...I'd wean him off by letting him watch world cup re-runs....'

Pat's Bar, Rotgut Tasting 5-7.

My broker went to Antigua ... I had to settle for Coney Island.

Warhol Exhibit

"Come on, drink up! Haven't you got gnomes to go to!?!"