Talented Pet Trainer Gifts

Genius Parrot

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Polly txt speak

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

"Quick, start the car!"

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

"Hey Lady this is a sixty zone!"

'Bert's dog training.'

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

'He's not supposed to go out.'

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

Litter Tray Training

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

Dog stretching before a walk.

"Don't even think about it."

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

"I wasn't howling at the moon. I was singing along to my iPod."

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

"Settle down boy, they're not actual cat-fish."

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

'Listen Sonny, I don't want or NEED to get to the other side!'

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'