Tailor Humor Pillows

"I'm a 34" struggling in a 36"- let me have a 38"."

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

I like this one. Do you have it in blue?

Dang! My shorts are riding up on me again!

"They're not Levi Strauss - they're not Levi Tate."

The Dandy

"The one time in our lives when it's acceptable to run around naked, but they dress us up like L. L. Bean catalog."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

Flight Socks.

"I found an old photo of us, when we were punk rockers... Didn't we look ridiculous?"

On the catwalk it looked elegant and sexy! What happened?

Cat scares away fish design on man's shirt.

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'

"Arr! This isn't the map to the treasure, it's the map to me winter sweaters."

Alpine Pipe

"I'm thinking of waxing my back."

Where Pleather Comes From

'My tux is at the cleaners.'

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

Misguided Hairstyles of The Animal World.

'It's royal Stilton, put a tie on.'

"It's actually an ink stain but my wife has grown quite fond of it."

A Moosetache.

"Thanks to coffee I never come down from manic high."

"They're mire aesthetic than practical."

"Do you do these in sheep?"

"Does this shirt make me look gay?"

'She gave me the tools and said 'Enjoy yourself.' Then, when I started building stuff, she left me.'

'Have I ever considered electrolysis? What's electrolysis?'

"We are in a world. just not West World."

"Here you go; a tie to make your belly look smaller."

"Why are they called sweatpants if you don't sweat in them?"