Tail Pugilist Gifts

Cat boxer

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"I finally caught you... now what?"

"So, what are you reading?"

Lady walking a dog with a big tail.

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

"It's been one of those days. I don't know if I’ve been chasing my tail or it's been chasing me."

'Doctor, did you say 5 minutes of traction, or 5 hours?'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

"Edgar's very politically engaged ever since he began using his vote as an anger management tool."

'This should soothe any hurt feelings.'

'Work the jab! Move your feet! Attack, attack, attack! ...But be careful. He's got a human shield.'

'Be careful, Vanessa, I think she's looking for trouble!'

'Did I ever break my nose? No. Three of my opponents did that for me...'

Boxer's Hair Styles.

"As I see it, the issue with dog-walking services is that the pace is dictated by whoever is slowest..."

'Soon as your endorphins kick in, you'll feel great.'

Bipartisan means when both political parties agree on something. Bipartisan agreements are now on the endangered species list.

Global warming.

'I know I can count on you... that's the problem.'

'Now, I want you to get back out there and beg him for mercy!'

"...and forget your damn sensitivity training."

'I don't think his fists can take much more of the punishment your head's inflicting on them.'

'Darling. Let's get the Gustavssons over this weekend for some more bare knuckle boxing.'

'Let him go.' - 'No, he'll hit me again.'

Wordplay: Shock Absorber.

"The hardest thing about winning bouts? The other guy's fists."

"You'd better cool it. Remember what he did to you last time."

Shadow Punch

'Don't worry about the loss. At 143.75, if you gain 3 ounces, we can try for the light junior welter super bantam title.'

A boxer uses a punching bag while he has broken legs.

Squirrel Salon

'You sure this is allowed?.'