Tactless Humor Fan Gifts

"Let's see, where can I hang this good luck shamrock garland? How about on one of your casts?"

Look at that big fat man!

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

The Brothers Grime

10 K Tail-Chase

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

The Snooze Bar.

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Beer Parasol.

Winter Weather.

To encourage patients to take their medication, Dr. Gratner brought in a sketch artist to show them what they will look like in six months without meds.

tRUMp, Pirate President

'Too many people in our state are overweight, Senator. They want fat-free pork.'

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

'Did you hear that? They said 'Hello' to you.'

No, I don

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

"I fell to the ground from a height of about two metres when I was born: My very first stunt!"

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

'Joe has been partying hard!'

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

"My favorite part of the story was when Prince Charming kissed Sleeping Beauty and she totally rebooted."

Presidential surveillance ass!"

"Fish finder."

The bird feeder.

'Bob, wait!!! Nice try, bear.'

'It will be a difficult adjustment, but it doesn't mean you can't still live a full and rewarding life, say, in the library, or even a miniature golf course.'

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''