Tabletop Chuckles Pillows

"Actually he's not begging."

Help!I am being forced to eat vegetables

How was I supposed to know she was under age?

"Here's the problem. Your computer isn't obsolete, you are."

'When I die could you preserve my liver for medical research? You've done that already.'

"I tied his line around this log, then I tug on it once in awhile. He's gullible, because it's been three hours now."

"It's weeder's elbow."

'Uh-Oh... I better watch my legs! There comes a cook - o - dile!'

'What do you mean, I get a reprieve from my wife's cooking? My wife is a cook here at the hospital.'

'He's our Spam expert!'

"So you hired them to do the tidying up?"

They're short of staff!

The Terror Of Folkenstein

'It's half past November, young man! Get back into your room and hibernate!'

"Gwen, call the employment agency back, please, we just created our first 3-D employee!"

At The Skinny Customer Restaurant

Witch sends Friend Requests to Hansel and Gretel

"I haven't written anything yet, but I'm looking for someone to ghostwrite my book 'how to delegate.'"

"If I need to stop smoking and lose weight...what are you going to do about it?"

You Will Eat A Fortune Cookie.

'Now take a deep breath and visualize your client being acquitted.'

New! Cell-U-Lite Tellaphone: 'Hmmm! There's something wrong here!'

"I paid twelve quid for this and it only mentions nine!"

Book Burp

"Would you describe yourself as conservative voter."

"I just found something else I won't eat."

"I won't do full frontals. I have my career to think of!"

'The sonar finds underwater structure. You watch out for surface structure.'

"Try rebooting your computer again..."