Sweet Humorist Pillows

'You're lucky she didn't press charges. Never touch a woman eating ice cream.'

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

This next song goes out to the girl who stole my heart and my guitar.

Honest Vending

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

Phoenix

Rude Snowpeople

Tunnel of Like.

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"How barbaric! Females should be wooed by colourful displays, not fighting!"

Barman In Love.

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"Of course I've been drinking!"

'You've had enough!'

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

'I love you, Howard, but let's not jump to conclusions.'

Daffodil bulbs

Tooth fairy

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

'Now that's what I call rejection.'

The stone is semi-precious, so I got you two.

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

Caterpillars in love

Dating in 2020

"Aperitif?"

Homophone Encounter

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

'Tony can't come out to play now, he's on his orthodontopole!'

'For the last time, Butchie, I love you but I'm not in love with you.'

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."