Survivor Supporter Gifts

'The good news is the airline was trying to skimp on fuel, and no terrorists were involved.'t

Desert Island BBQ

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

Female chemotherapy warrior.

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

He was out in no time, with a new outlook and a clean slate.

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

"It's my 30-day chip. One month catnip free."

"It looks like a pitch for a survival-themed reality show."

Need tickets.

"What if I told you that everything you knew about slowly going insane on a desert island was wrong?"

'Stop! Wait 'til he finishes cleaning my teeth!'

"And now Survivor Six...walking through your kid's room barefoot in the dark..."

"Now do you believe me?"

"All I need now is someone who wants to adopt a 95 pound lap dog."

'Are you sure this is just a mirage we're crawling through?'

No Loitering

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

Martin Gray.

I survived end of the world after party.

That Bear Grylls eats some EVIL crap, I'm telling you!

"When they guaranteed delivery anywhere, anyplace, they weren't kidding."

"For the last time — there is no ‘other woman’!"

Real Hopscotch: 'A 12-Step Program for the addiction to scotch.'

Hand Sanitiser in the Middle of the Ocean

Snowmen during the Stone Age...

"We’re ready when you are!"

"You been here long?"

When he runs out of beans, Lou discovers that civilization was not, after all, destroyed on January 1, 2001.

"If she was abused, why didn’t she report it?"

"No, we're no gods, we're God's gift to women!"

Workaholics anonymous

Eskimo in Igloo

Madness of isolation on a desert island.

"Maybe you should have put the rescue note in the bottle rather than just floating it out to sea."