Survival Preparation Gifts

Remain calm, we need to talk. We don't want to alarm you. Run for your life! Oh boy. The economic news is not good. It's apocalyptic. We both lived through the depression. More like barely survived. We're seeing parallels -- lack of government investment, no-tax policies ... Fire, disease, bad cellphone coverage ... You're enjoying this too much. you said I could. Spend cautiously, Rudy. Have a back-up plan. Sell your gadgets, buy canned goods. Oh boy.

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Desert Island Meals.

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

Emergency Phone.

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

65 Million Years Ago

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

"We needn't have a fancy home, just a place to rest when we no longer roam."

"All right, boys, we're had our fun."

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

Building a Shelter

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

"Now you can send it."

'I need a life saving app. I need a life saving app.'

Saved...life is good!

"Yes, I'm alone."

Desert Island Mishap

'Yeah, but if it's NOT a mirage, maybe we can find Mapquest on it!'

'Swiss Army Rescue Service. How can we help?'

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

That's actually the gorilla survival manoeuvre. . .

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

'Rubbing sticks together was a great idea. After 40 minutes, I'm so warm I don't need a fire!'

'I hate evolution!'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'Go and hunt for your own lunch. Who do you think I am, Ray Mears?!'

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

The trap

"Is it just me, right, is it just me ...?"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

Prepper Dog

'Quite nice here, when the tide goes out.'