Surrealist Comedy Lover T-Shirts

"I have to let you go. Sales are down, not to mention I'm losing my grip."

Maybe there's something to this global warming after all.

Minority Report

Convenience.

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

What do you say we team up to star in a sequel to "The Elephant Man" called "The Wolverine Boy"? !

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

Tree Mobsters. 'I didn't hear anything. Did you hear anything?' 'I didn't hear anything.'

'No, you weren't there. But in your expert opinion as a certified brainiac, do you think he did it?'

'Pencil on couch being psycho analysed.'

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

National Liberty and Tax Codes.

"Bad news. Our heads aren't lightbulbs."

"I was forced into early retirement. Is that even legal?"

Eugene Ionesco

"Are you sure? It doesn't look like a diet pill!"

Fun at the Fair.

'I don't understand. Why do you want to have your arms extended?'

A Grazing Shark

A Failiure to Communicate

A guy who learned everything he needed to know in Kindergarten.

"Hi guys. I'm Lawyer man, and my power is of attorney."

'That pretty much kills my appendicitis diagnosis.'

"Thank you all for attending this first conference of the surveillance camera recording industry."

'Allow me to suck the electricity out.'

Wearing radiation suits to clean the toilet

Levitation Man Avoids Angry Husband.

Whaaaah!(Scarey ghost shaped fart).

"How come Dracula's hair looked so neat if he can't look in a mirror"

"Okay, so the current occupants are being tormented by supernatural forces, but they do agree to pay closing costs."

A Toxic-Waste-Think-Tank With Toxic-Thoughts.

Pet Foods

'I'm afraid we only publish A list celebrity cookbooks.'

"For me it's all about the craft of acting."