Surreal Story Enthusiast Gifts

'I never heard anything like that before. What does it mean?'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

'Where was the TSA?'

Audio Books

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

'Dad's bedtime story was decent, but the special effects were non-existent.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"This makes Pamplona seem like child's play."

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

Jacques et Jille

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

Dali Chooses a Lobster

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

"I can't WAIT to see it."

"I was kicked out from another kid's bed. Do you mind if I crash under yours for awhile?"

"We started losing money right around the time we decided to just lazily remake old movies with the race or gender of the main character switched from the original." "We're burning through cash and we urgently need to course correct and try something different." "So we're going to make fresh stories with new and interesting characters?" "What?" "No."

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

allovertheplace.com

A were-cow.

A dream of consequence

Men discussing a book on a chat show

'Hello room service - can you come and tuck me in and read me a story please'

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

Proceedings of the club

"The Salvador Dali Museum does offer flex time to employees."

The three Musketeers give a PowerPoint.

"It's post-gingerbread."

"... and your great great grand father lost the race but the it was discovered the tortoise was on stéroids."

"I preferred the graphic novel of the origin story of the original prequel."