Surprise Appreciator Pillows

'Unfortunately sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel isn't all it at first seems...''

Deadpan Delivery.

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

'I think we took a wrong turn between the seventh and eight holes.'

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

"I like to stay on top of things."

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

"...but, seriously..."

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'

Road sign with a dinosaur.

"... And the cold foam cascara nitro goes to Lazarus!"

"Do you know what time they open love?"

'Sit!'

'When I asked for a bottle of house red...'

'No, but next week, the fireworks start in earnest.'

"Have you got it in beige?"

"Are you binge watching again?"

"This is not what I meant when I said you should try to live in the present."

"Excuse me, sir. Our phones are down, so I'm here with your wake-up call."

Cash Machine pulls a face at a customer.

"Are we admiring a sunrise or a sunset?"

"What are you doing?!"

Here Lies Bill Smith, Victim of a Mad Axe Murderer, Rest in Pieces

'Amazing what you can get on eBay.'

This episode would be known as 'The sink of doom!'

"This idea of offering staff flexible working options is genius, we should have done it years ago!"

Gun shop owner dies from arrow in back.

Death in park

Burglar opens safe of the ACME MAGIC SHOP, finds it empty, slams door, opens it again and finds the safe full of money.

The Same Old Era.

The End.

"Some of us negotiate our contracts better than others."

Servant who has broken her mistress' new milk jug

'I may not know much about art, but I do know what I like. Have you heard me purr yet?'