Surgery Humor Pillows

"Which is it today doctor, - Back, Beatles, or Backstreet Boys?"

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

Current location

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

'You know what'll do wonders for you? A nose job.'

"It was a botched surgery."

"When Butcher Bob gets back from lunch this one is getting a vasectomy."

"Let's just start cutting and see what happens."

'As for the tonsillectomy...there was a little mix-up... In other words, you now have cup size D!'

Pinocchio has a nose job.

'Good help is hard to find, so I decided to clone myself.'

"Rolling pizza cutter."

'I've a horrible feeling I've left one of the implements inside the patient, Chang.'

'My patient needs a new kidney. Make any grave mistakes today?'

Reflex Testing -"...and you're sure you can't feel it"

"Did you get some work done?"

Hospital Cleaning.

Patients with HMO dread anesthesia.

"No response doctor! The patient is sedated!"

"He's going to be fine. We're just putting his giblets back."

'You'll be aware during the entire procedure because our anesthetic has been recalled by the F.D.A.'

'Where did you say the new anaesthetist trained?'

"Why do I always get the stupid wobbly table?"

Doctor: 'Mind if I cut in?'

Casino plastic surgery...specializing poker faces.

"Sorry, Bob, those are the rules– you drop the kidney, you give them yours."

"Say, does anyone here know how to tie a sailor's knot?"

"Relax! He's in good hands!!"

'Doc, check out screen 2 in ten minutes...we got the big game!'

Dentists who do appendectomies.

"Mr Brown. Are you in for a triple bypass or an ingrown toenail?"