Surfboard Sage Pillows

"The Americans must be at the end of their tether. They're sending in Californian Surf Nazis!"

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

"For the last time, I’m not Bigfoot — I’m Larry from Vermont!"

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

Academics At The Beach: The Old Man And The Sea

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

"The good news is, the wind turbine is working great, the bad news is, it blew all the solar panels off the roof."

Woah, This was well worth swapping my flying saucer for!

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'No, even I don't know the secret of golf.'

'Found it ... Good heavens! It's the size of a soccer ball!..'

'That's not whitewash....that's detergent!'

The Senior Citizen Surfer

Jesus Saves

"If you don't want to know the score..."

A repairman has a small box marked 'Useful Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Screws.'

A shark ventriloquist.

"It's always, 'hey God, thank for the win! It's never, 'hey God, need tickets?"

"Great waves to day, dude!"

" guess we can relax. They say they're Zulu Surfer Dudes."

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe the simplest modes of travel are the best.

'Dinosaur museum,soccer pundit exhibit.

'We do not tee off in front of the markers.' - 'This is my second stroke.'

Moses Parting the Half-Pipe

'Stop! Listen to me! Size matters!!'

Holiday on Thin Ice

Wind Surfing

When Daisy died, you said she'd gone to a better place!

"You just couldn't shut up could you?"

The end is rear!