Supplement Collection Gifts

"SHEESH. What will it be like when I'm eighty?!"

The Missing Sock Returns

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

Need a vitaminlike pill, but don't want to risk the side effects? Then try the world's first multivitamin placebo! They don't do any good, but they don't do any harm either.

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

Bathroom shelf full of clocks and pills.

'Too much Omega 3.'

"I think you might be overdoing the omega-3 oils George."

Nutritional Supplements.

Protein Powder Irony

Girl holding money.

'Yes, Dear, they are very pretty shoes!'

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

A man in bathrobe smoking a pipe sits in an armchair as a dog delivers endless pairs of shoes and boots to him.

"You have ice water in your veins."

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

'It's good that you're taking vitamins... but you need to stop BUTTERING them.'

'Those are to increase my mental energy. . . Those are a mild sedative to calm my nerves.'

'Buy a bottle of these vitamins. If you're strong enough to get the lid off, don't take them.'

'I'm part of a double-blind study to see how weight loss supplements help people lose weight. I'm guessing I received the sugar pill placebos.'

"Lay off the natural remedies. You're beginning to ferment."

Dummy no. 5836 was found lying in a pool of his own fake vomit.

'He tried to take away fuzzy bear.'

Not much, just chillin' with my Peeps. (This cartoon was originally published on 2013-03-28).

'I think we're going to have to put some more calcium in your diet.'

Missing Sock

My incredible dedicated pet monkey. You've waited in line for a week at Computer Villa. Computer Villa parking lot. Now I have my new Ybox game console. I am complete man. I am whole. The new Playstation comes out this fall. I am empty and wanting. Form a new line to the left!

'Time for your One-a-Year vitamin supplement pill, dear.'

'This is a pick 'n' mix ward - you choose your own medicine.'

My first Boyfriend.

'I need something that will raise my energy level but not my self esteem - I'm already full of myself.'

'You're taking too much of that clamshell calcium, Margaret.'

'Apparently I need to lower the dosage of salmon capsules that I'm giving Don and the kids.'