Supermarket Superstar Gifts

Christmas Special Shopping Trolley.

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

Only One Item or Fewer.

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

Supermarket Merge

'Retirement Training Program'"Very good, Larry! Just one more step and you'll have the entire aisle blocked!"

Artificial Isle

Biker chopper shopper

'Advanced warning: High cholesterol 10mtrs ahead.'

"Companies know too much about us, listen...'You've earned 500 points and it's time you got back in touch with your cousin Emma'!"

Large Very Fresh Eggs

'Do you sell eggs? . . . I forgot to say that I have middle class guilt. . .'

'I've got one of those wobbly forwards trolleys!'

Women shopping with children in the trolley.

"That will be $109.85." "What! Sign says they’re $1.69 each." "Yes, and you have 65 of them."

'Oi, do you mind, trying to speak to my colleague - two self service tills having a chat together.'

Supermarket 'Men, temporary lobotomy patch'

Super express lane for working mothers only!

Stocktaker counts contents of baked-bean tins.

"Mummy! Can't we go to Tescos like everyone else?"

'Yes?'

Till malfunction

'Blimey, you must have charged for the trolley as well!'

"Someone's gone to look for a price - they won't be long!"

'I vote we throw caution to the wind.'

'Smooth Mustard' and 'Coarse mustard'

'Hurry dear, before the prices go up again!'

"Great idea boss! Keeps kids occupied and hooked up to a generator powers the store's lights!!"

'Try looking on the bright side - they could save you a trip to the supermarket.'

"We've got a real feisty one here. We caught it trying to cross the stream behind the store."

Product Placement in the Wild...

UK supermarket to employ 20,000: 'Don't forget madam, if you spend over ?40 we'll give you a member of staff to take home with you.'