Sun-soaked Humorist Gifts

'Water! Water! Scotch! Water!'

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

Scene on the English coast.

Bed of Nails on Holiday

'Icarus, let's get a tan.'

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

'A bike this nice, I didn't think you'd mind me bathing it in your bathtub. Do you have an extra blanket, it'll be sleeping in our room.'

"What time should we wake him for breakfast?"

'Is this the way to the beach?'

'This is totally bananas!'

'I am wearing my bikini!'

"If that book is gonna deposit hundreds of grains of sand in our bed later tonight, it better be damn juicy."

'Albert Figgis gets board backing.'

Ah heck, don't complain now! This is just the 'Warm-up'!

'The double codpiece and chips is very popular with the Blackpool crowd, your highness.'

'There goes Tokyo.'

The Domestic Violence Workshop Commences At 2:30.

"OY! You trying to nick my chips?"

Wilkins refused to sink to their level.

'The gannets are worse than the gulls!'

"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed..."

Bookcase at the Beach.

'They're actually street lamp-powered panels.'

Toast with tanlines

'POSTED! TOPLESS BATHERS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT!'

'Last week he gave me artificial recreation.'

Dead mermaid

TV 7 Weather

'Up periscope!'

"Next on Winterwatch, we check in on Mr and Mrs Henderson who are hibernating to avoid putting the heating on."

Antacid rain