Summertime Snacker Pillows

"Since it's only 10am, I'll have coffee, strawberry, and maple in a waffle cone."

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

"The bagels are better in New York."

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"I was going to share my cookies with teddy, but he's on a diet....so I had to eat them all."

"I'm learning to appreciate the simple things in life."

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'

"Do you want the last piece, or can I have it?"

"It's just - this McDonald's closes at midnight."

The downside of the cupcake bed.

'I knew I needed help when I started going to fast food places only at night so I wouldn't have to share with sea gulls.'

Bedside Manna.

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

'This fridge is fitted with CCTV.'

"You'll never lose weight if you don't stop nibbling at your desk."

"We grind our own catnip."

"Congratulations! For checking the fridge 30 times in under an hour, you've won something that you actually want to eat!"

"People are inherently complicated, and if you eat it late enough at night, cereal can be dinner and breakfast!"

"So here we are...the great outdoors!"

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

"I recommend the pimento loaf with pickle. It's bursting with umami."

'I woke up in February, and couldn't get back to sleep, so I got up, killed and ate a moose.'

'Only two cookies? What is this -- a quota system?'

'It's actually cheaper than the bait shop.'

'You were up four times last night.'

"I was just... uh... looking for the low-fat yogurt."

Large man uses 'Fat Nav' to lead him to large Christmas pudding.

"Late night snack? No, I...I was just checking expiration dates, dear!"

'Only two cookies? What is this -- a quota system?'

I know you wanted a virgin but it's all I could find at this time on a Friday night.

'Get the kind with the little marshmallows.'

Diet Enforcer