Bedtime Snacker Pillows

'You've been eating crisps in bed again, haven't you?'

Bedside Manna.

How farmers get away w/ eating crackers in bed

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"I was going to share my cookies with teddy, but he's on a diet....so I had to eat them all."

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'

"What the heck did I do with that leftover turkey?!"

"Do you want the last piece, or can I have it?"

"It's the kind of trade you get in a twenty-four-hour-a-day joint."

'I knew I needed help when I started going to fast food places only at night so I wouldn't have to share with sea gulls.'

The downside of the cupcake bed.

"It's just - this McDonald's closes at midnight."

'This fridge is fitted with CCTV.'

'I woke up in February, and couldn't get back to sleep, so I got up, killed and ate a moose.'

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"Congratulations! For checking the fridge 30 times in under an hour, you've won something that you actually want to eat!"

Lady has a coffee break.

"People are inherently complicated, and if you eat it late enough at night, cereal can be dinner and breakfast!"

Unbeknown to other, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'You were up four times last night.'

Diet Enforcer

The Cat that Ate the Canary, 3 a.m.

Al, do you ever go back in time and try to pinpoint moments when you made bad life choices? Actually, after an episode of gastric distress this morning, I journeyed back in time to last night. I pinpointed midnight as the moment, and I pinpointed pizza as a bad life choice.

I know you wanted a virgin but it's all I could find at this time on a Friday night.

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

We're never going to lose weight if we don't get rid of the fridge light.

'That's the last time I have cheese for supper...!'

"I was just... uh... looking for the low-fat yogurt."

"You're home, dear. We don't have room service."

"Late night snack? No, I...I was just checking expiration dates, dear!"

Parents sleeping with a new baby.