Nighttime Snackers Pillows

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

'I can't sleep. I'm too awake.'

"What the heck did I do with that leftover turkey?!"

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'

"Do you want the last piece, or can I have it?"

"It's the kind of trade you get in a twenty-four-hour-a-day joint."

Bedside Manna.

The downside of the cupcake bed.

"It's just - this McDonald's closes at midnight."

'I knew I needed help when I started going to fast food places only at night so I wouldn't have to share with sea gulls.'

"Tia Carmen, I think I'm growing up. I ate five slices of cold pizza at 3 in the morning...and I woke up with a stomachache."

Unbeknown to others, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'This fridge is fitted with CCTV.'

"People are inherently complicated, and if you eat it late enough at night, cereal can be dinner and breakfast!"

"Congratulations! For checking the fridge 30 times in under an hour, you've won something that you actually want to eat!"

Pizza and Related Searches.

Mouse shopping after hours

'I woke up in February, and couldn't get back to sleep, so I got up, killed and ate a moose.'

Unbeknown to other, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'You were up four times last night.'

Diet Enforcer

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

I know you wanted a virgin but it's all I could find at this time on a Friday night.

We're never going to lose weight if we don't get rid of the fridge light.

The Cat that Ate the Canary, 3 a.m.

'That's the last time I have cheese for supper...!'

How farmers get away w/ eating crackers in bed

Al, do you ever go back in time and try to pinpoint moments when you made bad life choices? Actually, after an episode of gastric distress this morning, I journeyed back in time to last night. I pinpointed midnight as the moment, and I pinpointed pizza as a bad life choice.

"Late night snack? No, I...I was just checking expiration dates, dear!"

"I was just... uh... looking for the low-fat yogurt."

"You're home, dear. We don't have room service."