Sugar-free Enthusiast Gifts

"It's just a reaction to all that artificial flavoring and artificial sweetening. Now if you just take this synthetic medicine..."

"Sergio, just for you, I made this cake glucose free.... I don't know how to make glucose free."

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"Too much sugar."

'Of course it's safe. It has no preservatives, no additives, no artificial coloring...'

Sweet surprise.

'I put the cake in the blender because I wanted a glass of cake.'

"Let's just say the chocolate chip cookie diet isn't working."

Chocs away.

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

'Just three pieces of cake for 200 hundred guests?'

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

"D'you remember caramel before it all became 'salted?'"

"I'll split my candy with you if you take me Trick or Treating."

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"

'I counted them as well. . .There were four too many.'

I Bake. Deal with it.

'We cut it into teensy-weensy squares.'

'I'll accept two potions of white crystalline sucrose in final settlement.'

The Pope getting a Popsicle for Popes from the Freezer

Snowman wife to husband eating ice cream: 'Remember what the diabetes counselor said, Hal - you are what you eat.'

'I've never heard of a lactose intolerant cow!'

"...and lay off the energy drinks..."

"You can eat all the cake you want and still get into heaven."

"Ok, here's the problem right here. No candy."

"According to this analysis, Gibbons, last year your department spent forty-five thousand dollars on candy alone."

'What sets pastry school apart is, you have to get a job right away, to pay for a new wardrobe.'

It's crème brûlée, Julia. It doesn't have a subtext.

'She'll have a nasty sugar hangover tomorrow.'

"Would you care for a slice of lemon dribble cake Mr Dobbs?"

If you pony is difficult to catch...take a good supply of lump sugar with you...and eat as much of it as you can.

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."