Suburbanite Satirist Gifts

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

Superman flies Batman over a suburban neighborhood.

'I use my Blackberry all the time to check the competition's executive bonuses.'

It's from the homeowners association --- They want me to stop leaving my worries on the doorstep.

Beware of the Lawn

Suburban street.

'I didn't have time to cut the lawn, so I used your credit card to have it carpeted. Do you like the cool color I picked out?'

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

"Quick! Get your gun, Pa! Here come the suburbs."

Autumn Leaves

Traffic Lights Medicine

"I'm thinking about moving out of the suburbs."

Lex Ave Express

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, there will be no delays on the subway today."

'My therapist suggested I redirect my anger into landscaping and gardening!'

",,,These job cuts will not affect patient care...."

Intentional Community vs. Community of Sheer Happenstance

Cops on trains: 'Is that a truncheon, or are you just pleased to see me?'

Suburban blues legends

"Well, Charles, it wasn't a 'pesky little wasp,' it was a hummingbird."

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

Blissful Acres - An Ignorant Community

'Well, that's just great...zombies! There goes the neighbourhood!'

Slower than a rubber-tipped arrow,as powerful as a wind-up choo-choo, unable to step over his shoelaces, it's Copyright Free Man!

'And me fresh out of xanax.'

"I'm home dear! So what have you been doing today?"

(Used to be) END.

Titian's Venus of Mamaroneck

'The brakes aren't working because of 'mechanical fatigue'...The escalator isn't working because of 'mechanical fatigue'...why don't you walk up?'

'It's my first dog house with indoor plumbing.'

"You know what I like about L.A.? We don't have to be interesting anymore."

Igloo.

'Goodness me referee one really must question your visual acuity.'

COVID FAQs.

'Looks like they have their own problems with suburban encroachment.'