Suburban Strategists Gifts

"Excuse me,are you leaving?"

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"He loves his leaf blower."

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Hard Hat Area/Hard Nosed Area.

'Every year local authorities whinge on about needing more money to maintain services.'

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"

'Why can't I park it here? I'm just getting my moneys worth.'

"This is my stop, Phil, you'll be C.E.O. till Sixty-third Street."

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

Great Urban Sprawl

"Face it, Larry. We're small fish and des Moines isn't that big a pond."

Sidewalk the game

Poker Moms

Opium Den 2019

Country Mouse and City Mouse Meet Suburb Mouse

"We thought a soulless, desolate community would be good for the kids."

"Look lady, I told you before; anything over one-hundred pounds you gotta take to the dump yourself."

Fake beggar.

"The boondocks R us, I guess."

Mowing the Lawn

"It ran amok."

"If the Greenlanders don't want to become Americans, Trump can buy our meadow! It's green, too, and we wouldn't have to keep pulling up the weeds!"

Muggers.

Turning away/ spare change -neck brace $10

Next 5 Exits: Five sprawling suburbs that look so much like each other even WE can't tell the difference any more. Best of luck to you.

"Baldo, you will never flip off people on the highway again...do you hear me?"

'Over Building'

White middle class riot.

"'Scuse me, you getting out?"

'I'm not writing him out a ticket...you do it!'

Town Planning Dept looking at map with parks and green spaces. 'Ok! Let's eat our greens'

Supermarket aisles in relation to health.

Clamped car in traffic