Suburban Rebel Gifts

'...and this is our noisiest model Sir - just right for waking up the neighbours on a Sunday morning.'

"I gotta be me!"

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"The trees are laughing at us."

"Sarge, he says he wants to make a 'fashion statement'!"

"I can do whatever I want. It's a free country. Well, at least for the time being."

Non-Uniform Day Today.

'I'm sorry, but there's nothing in the zoning regulations covering bad taste.'

Rugby Player

"Prepare to meet thy blower."

Lawrence of Suburbia

Man Diverts the Hunt...and hides the fox!

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this seminar is about how to make profits in times of crisis..."

A chicken coop with a loudspeaker on the roof

'I seem to be very conservative but secretly, I'm a rebel - I don't wear pants.'

'Don't give me that! I know for a fact, he was in my flowerbeds!!'

I've turned to the darkside!

'The growing field of lawn enforcement'.

"Look lady, I told you before; anything over one-hundred pounds you gotta take to the dump yourself."

"My parents decriminalized sugar."

"It ran amok."

"I'd say, psychotic-obsessive -- but I happen to know he's a top-level economist."

'I don't know what you're complaining about. I should charge you for breathing my second hand smoke. This happens to be a very expensive Cuban cigar!'

Next 5 Exits: Five sprawling suburbs that look so much like each other even WE can't tell the difference any more. Best of luck to you.

"You're not from around here, are you?"

'Look - decide. Are you going to launch an attack on tradition, or make a few bob?'

Beware Of The Hog...

The Courier Out of hell

Ploughing your own furrow

"I'm claiming diminished responsibilities."

Turning the Tables Around

'Do you know what I feel like Doris? I feel like kickin' some ass.'

"Guess who has two thumbs and did not waste HIS Sunday morning listening to lies."