Substitute Food Specialist Gifts

"Happy Birthday, dear! It's gluten-free, lactose-free and sugar-free."

Soup of the month.

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

"May I take your plate or are you still nibbling?"

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

Tartar sauce.

"In da house"

Christmas Canapes

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

'You wouldn't believe how hard it is for me to unwind after work.'

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

'The dept. of agriculture says yes, the environmental protection agency says maybe, and the food and drug administration says no.'

The Blending Of Comestibles And Foam Rubber At The Submolecular Level!

Warning: Eating This Food Could Result in a Decrease of Health Benefits

'I'm all for GM food, it's done wonders for my profit margins!'

'There's not use-by date on honey: It pretty much lasts forever...'

"I just finished my on-line food safety course!"

Coronavirus Blocks Food Delivery

'Ryker's Natural Foods - Kelp wanted'

"Dealing with a poorly informed public over GM crops is a nightmare...."

Todays Special: Beans on Toast #2.50 (use of tin-opener 10- extra. . .)

Antonio Carluccio.

Ace Doughnut Co.

'That IS the chef's surprise, sir -- the pork chops are really tofu.'

Something Grown Something Shot.

'Hey that's our waiter on his way home!'

"Apparently we're reared by people who share the values of the people who eat us."

'There's an inspector here from the Board of Health who would like to see the chicken soup.'

"Aw, man, that's never coming out."

"Wonderful - this will be the absolute best popcorn anyone has ever seen."

'I've worked here for 20 years. I guess you could call me a 'seasoned' veteran.'