Subscription Skeptic Gifts

Larry hits a paywall while reading an eye exam chart.

"You know very well what subscription forms."

"Now paid subscribers will have access to as much free content as non-subscribers."

Q & A's How to unsubscribe.

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

'Six years ago you received a complimentary set of steak knives. You thought they were free didn't you Jimmy?...'

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

'He's determined to not pay for The Times online.'

Subpoena-of-the-Month Club

"I broke off the relationship, then came the endless reminders, the sad letters and emails...It's tough cancelling a subscription."

Houdini 2019

"I subscribed to a collector's magazine! It has great interviews with big-time collectors who buy the world's rarest treasures."

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"This bill is the same as your estimate! What did'nt you do?"

'How did I become Vice-President? You ask...I came up with the logest list of fees to charge bank customers.'

"I'm increasing your OnlyFan subscription..."

"When did Charlie switch to a subscription model?" "Sniff my butt"

"I'm sure it was just an oversight, sir, but your subscription to 'Time' has lapsed."

"I'll write your a prescription for a medication that's been recommended in three out of four commercials."

Big Retail is watching you... They're just not really watching what they've got.

Warning people with clipboards operate in this area.

I think I could explain it better to the girl in your TV commercial.

Subscribe to The Times? Girl Scout cookies? Donate to the food bank? Bob only needed a few items, but first he had to walk the Solicitor Gauntlet.

'I subscribe to HBO, Netflix & Hulu. . . but I am dropping you.'

'Your magnified images will resume after these messages...'

"Next time, don't call me at 3 a.m. to ask if a pill you saw on late night TV is right for you!"

'Stop whining about commitment! I only asked you to go in on a magazine subscription.'

'A second opinion? All right, but I charge double for that.'

'No! There isn't an option to unsubscribe!'

Sign reads: Please subscribe to see the rest of this view.

Idiot! You get 12 free rocks, but now you have to buy a rock every month for a year!

TV remotes.

Your Trial Subscription Has Expired.